Nonviolent Communication by Learning How to Love
An Experiment in teaching the skills of nonviolent communication
Now, years into a personal, non-scientific and ongoing experiment, I am ready to share what I have learned and what I know, so far. It is my hope that this will Assist and Encourage you who are already Gimpy fans to dive deeper into Love, and those of you yet to become Gimpy fans to come on in, the water’s fine!
The question and intent of the experiment:
How young can one begin educating children in the way and power of how to Love using nonviolent communication and actions?
How do you know when that information has been internalized?
What I learned, what I know:
- Children are innately altruistic.
- A child of 2 ½ can memorize and recite the saying, “A Loving Touch Profits Every Creature At Some Center Point.”
- This can be used as a mnemonic to assist adults and older children in remembering the actions associated with Love: (Attentiveness, Listening, Thanking, Praising, Encouraging, Comforting, Assisting, Sharing, Contributing and Protecting)
- A child of four can understand what these words mean, and can identify them as… “part of Loving”
- In my own personal experience, I hear and witness my 4 year old great-grandson explain to his 2 year old sister that these actions are part of Loving. One recent example, “… Sister, taking things is not part of Loving, Sharing is part of Loving!”
- A 2 year old can know and can explain that she is Sharing and that Sharing is part of Loving. Recent example overheard as 2 year old is handing 9 month old sibling a toy, “…here is a toy for you, I am Sharing, it is part of Loving.
- Learning the language of love is learning the language of nonviolent communication and nonviolent actions.
What this means:
- Children can learn, when parents have the resources, the action elements of Love very early in life. They can begin to understand, use and explain that these actions are the ways in which Love is delivered.
- Children who learn and employ this “System of Love” from an early age, learn the skills of nonviolent communication and how to love, long before they enter school, long before the teenage years, long before job hunting, dating, marriage, parenting or career building, (after which or during which, it is too late. I compare it to learning to swim before ending up in deep water) have an unfathomable advantage in understanding the intent and actions associated with mutually beneficial human interaction (Love). They also have the advantage of knowing the 10 Negative actions that cause it all to fall apart! Violations of the “System of Love,” whether intentional or not, destroy friendships, marriages, families, communities and even bring down nations.
- This is powerful, I mean, really powerful stuff!
Note:
It is very important to differentiate between feelings (emotions) and actions. The buzzwords of today, Compassion, Respect, Empathy, Sympathy etc. are emotions or emotional drivers that compel or urge us to act. They are NOT the actions. They can only be delivered through the ten (positive) actions above. They can be delivered with varying intensities and in unlimited creative ways. Nonetheless these 10 (positive) actions are the only actions through which you can show (act) that you Love someone or something no matter HOW much you may feel Love for them.
A Deeper Dive into Love
For those of you who want to take a deeper dive into Love, check out Gimpy’s Secret, the new Highlighted Edition Collection in the side bar. These parenting resources are all you need to start your children and you on… ” the move toward educated Love!”
Begin the New Year by creating an electrifying shift in awareness.
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